The Players Championship. TPC Sawgrass. This is my Carnegie Hall. My favorite event of the year aside from the Masters (obviously) and The Open (mostly because it’s okay to drink early in the morning).
At this rate I’ll probably never play TPC Sawgrass, and if I do, I guarantee I’ll put one in the water on seventeen.
Now that it’s in writing, it might as well be carved in stone. Such is my mental fortitude.
There will be no Creator Classic before this year’s Players. It’s a shame. I was hopeful that someone with real clout would get our Supreme Leader, Club Pro Guy, paired with Grant Horvat — let CPG teach the smiley youngster a thing or two about what happens in the back alleys of Mexico.
La escuela de la vida, hombre.
I’ve got to get something off my chest before we go any further… Jake Knapp WD’ing fifteen minutes before he was scheduled to tee off at the Arnold Palmer Invitational really dicked me over last week.
I wish I could withdraw from work a couple minutes before I’m supposed to clock in. Maybe that’s the trick — wait until the eleventh hour, then hit them with the I don’t feel so well card.
Alas, I’m not a professional golfer, I’m a public servant.
I attended the Players for the first time in 2021 and let me tell you, I was spoiled rotten. The tickets were provided by my financial advisor, Kenny. Unfortunately, we’ve since parted ways. Kenny, if you’re reading this, I apologize for my behavior at your client party. I misread the room.
The 2021 tournament was played on the heels of COVID, and they only admitted 20% capacity onto the grounds. I didn’t have to wait in line at the urinal. Didn’t have to wait for my complimentary Michelob Ultras (thanks again, Kenny). I had a clear view of whatever I wanted to see.
During the final round, I was greenside on eleven when Justin Thomas made a momentum-swinging eagle. If you look at the above photo, I am there lurking. And get this, as soon as J.T. walked off the green, he went and used the very bathroom I’d just used. For a good three weeks after the tournament, I told this story to every one of my friends. Not a single one of them cared. Literally. Not one person found it interesting.
Which is why it makes perfect sense for me to share it with you right now.
A lot has been made about TPC Sawgrass not being enough of a challenge, particularly since moving it from May to March in 2019. Davis Love and his team are coming in to do some redesign work in 2028. Should be an opportune time for me to get a discounted greens fee. Good stuff, Davis.
When the course hosted its first event in 1982, players found it unreasonably challenging. Jack Nicklaus had this to say about it: “I’ve never been very good at stopping a 5-iron on the hood of a car.”
Which gives me a YouTube idea: give a handful of us from the Learning Center a bucket of balls, a five-iron, and Grant Horvat’s Prius as a target. See if we can stop one on the hood. It’s all about descent angle, gentlemen.
I have no idea if Grant drives a Prius, but based on his personality, it seems like a reasonable guess.
It’s fun to look back at what players were saying about TPC Sawgrass back in 1982.
Tom Weiskopf said he’d “like to blow it up.”
Goodness, Tom. Take it easy. You can get arrested for saying stuff like that these days.
Lee Trevino said, “They ruined a perfectly good swamp.”
Which is a quote I’ve been plagiarizing for years, applying it to Disney World instead of a golf course. Every time I say it, people look at me like I’m a bitter asshole, but that’s how I feel.
The way today’s game is played, TPC Sawgrass has gotten much easier — which somehow makes this event very challenging to predict.
Even still, my pick is Ludvig Aberg, who lives in Ponte Vedra and regularly plays at TPC Sawgrass — but then again, so do a lot of these guys.
Fun fact: Ludvig used to live in Tallahassee, where he played out of Florida State’s course, Seminole Legacy Golf Club. I used to kick it around Tallahassee a bit myself. Never introduced myself to Ludvig, but I certainly drank beer and watched him practice — yes, it was as creepy as it sounds.
He’s a tall guy.
Who else do I like at the Players?
I like Rickie Fowler, whose cool and calm demeanor is admirable. He’s off to a solid start this year. It’d be nice to see him win.
I do not like Ricky Castillo, who’s coming off an opposite-field win in Puerto Rico. I’m hoping he doesn’t get a lot of TV coverage due to how unsettling I find his physical appearance. With him, the camera doesn’t add ten pounds, it sucks the life out of him.
After WD’ing prior to the third round at Bay Hill, Rory seems like he’ll be a game time decision for the Players. His plan is to continue treatment in South Florida and arrive at TPC sometime Wednesday.
Joel Dahmen and caddie Geno Bonnalie are back for the Players after parting ways. Geno has been on Isaiah Salinda’s bag, and Dahmen has been using a rotating cast. This would be one helluva fairytale ending. I’m sure the money-grubbers at Netflix already have contracts drawn up for the movie rights in the improbable event of Dahmen winning.
Despite a weird year and a simmering anger, Scheffler is still the heavy betting favorite. He’s been tinkering with drivers.
Can someone explain to me what the hell I’m missing here?
As much as it pains me to admit, I think Morikawa might win this event. He is everything I am not and that has caused me resentment and envy. But come on, he puts dog booties on his goldendoodle before it boards his private jet.
Our search for an assistant pro has entered its second week. If you think you have what it takes, head on over to the application portal. Not only would you get to work under the tutelage of CPG, it’s a handsomely compensated position. You’d get a salary, a signing bonus, power over those that have wronged you…
Otherwise, pop over to the Pro Shop for some reupped merchandise.
At the very least, enjoy your weekend. Here’s hoping we get a helluva tournament. If the last two weeks are any indication, we ought to be in for a treat.
If Ludvig Aberg WD’s moments before his tee time, I’m going to absolutely lose my mind.
You cost me a lot last week, Jake.
